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jaclcfrost:

"why do you like floral prints so much" because i’m not a person. secretly i’m just a mass of bees. trying to blend in with humans. unable to let go of my love of flowers

(via imaregisteredsexoffender)

urtube:

If i ever see any of you in public, the code is

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that way we know we’re from tumblr without revealing anything

(via imaregisteredsexoffender)

grandmaspubes:

frankoceanfanclub:

'Dont I get a hug' most cringeworthy line

Creepy boys’ anthem

(via imaregisteredsexoffender)

"I dont get along with other girls because girls are so bitchy"

bigbardafree:

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(via imaregisteredsexoffender)

mattressblowoutsale:

Adult things arent NEARLY as complex as I thought they were growing up I just walked into bank of america and said im here to open a checking account and they said ok and opened me a checking account

(via all-things-cutesy-and-nerdy)

i-mnotbrokenjustbent:

madelinelime:

When I was a kid I thought your 20s were supposed to be fun, not filled with perpetual anxiety about financial stability and constantly feeling like an unaccomplished piece of shit. 

That’s because it was fun for baby boomers and they basically gave us this impression it would always be like that, but then they ruined the economy.

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(Source: curseofthefanartlords, via all-things-cutesy-and-nerdy)

waitress:i'm sorry we're all out of mozzarella sticks
waitress:sir please stop cyring

Items People Tried To Sneak Through Customs

alicehopewalker:

sixpenceee:

A wooden door stuffed with cocaine

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Frogs in a film canister

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Cocaine disguised as candy

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Cats filled with opium

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Snake in a clay pot

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A gecko in a false book

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A metric ton of marijuana as a donkey

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SOURCE & MORE IMAGES

A METRIC TON OF WEED

(via all-things-cutesy-and-nerdy)

killbau:

horny for a meaningful relationship

(via nightofthelivingdeadpoetssociety)

hemmogod:

if someone writes you a letter or makes you a mixtape or composes a poem or song about you or creates literally anything for you then you had better cherish the absolute shit out of that person because they care about you a real lot

(Source: kinks182, via ellectrocution)

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